Saturday, February 17, 2007

Chairs for Couples anyone?

I don't know what I am going to Blog about really but I do know that it is my responsibility to Blog and so I do.

My Wife and I just finished a three day conference in our church here on the subject of marriage. It was a privilege to do it and we were glad when the pastor asked us to teach the course.

We aren't experts, but after counseling quite a few couples over the last year, it seemed it would be a good plan. We expected at most 30 couples and ended up with over 85, on the final night there were over 200 people. Some newly married and others, after 20+ years, that were barely married by a thread. The couples all enjoyed the teaching and learned what their personal responsibilities were to their spouses. If I were to break it all down into one phrase it would be this..... It doesn't matter if you feel like it....just do what is right anyway.

I will teach the same material in another few weeks to over 400 men from various churches throughout Venezuela. That's right... the same stuff..... Again!.... Why you ask?.... From very personal experience I have learned that men don't just get it......they get it ...EVENTUALLY!. It takes a lot of teaching to reverse the bad habits that have been formed in marriages over a lifetime. We have to break down barriers that 'machismo' has formed. We have to make them believe that when they obey the Word....their wife will usually follow them. Eventually! (tho not always) But then that is no excuse to stop doing what is right.

We hope to see families changed. It is not a question as to whether the teaching works or not, but, as to whether they work it out in their lives by doing what they have been taught.

The men were taught to love their wives by remembering the acronym C.O.U.P.L.E.S.
Closeness, Openness, Understanding, Peacemaking, Loyalty, and Esteem.
The women were taught to respect their husbands by remembering the acronym C.H.A.I.R.S.
Conquest, Hierarchy, Authority, Insight, Relationship, and Sexuality.
This all comes from a book titled Love and Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs.

Get the book. It is worth it.


Jungle Mom said...

You did a great job. Your sense of humor allows you to say some HARD things in a way that they can accept it without being offended. It was a blessing when the men started sharing things they had learned. Oh and the Mariachis were a great touch!!!

Pam said...

Mariachis?!? Wow! I love Mariachis, so romantic!! The acronyms were helpful. Good job!

#1 CUBS FAN said...

What a blessing! two hundred people!

Harry said...

Early in our marriage, I wasn't paying attention to my wife in the way she wanted me to. She let me know in her own "sweet" way. I'll never make that mistake again.

Jane-Jane said...

isn't it amazing how simple it is, but how difficult we make it?!?!?

I am so glad that it was you that said it takes men several times to hear something before they practice it!